NIMBYsof Britain

Become
a N.O.B.

Five pounds. Once. For life. You get a poster, a number, a certificate and three letters after your name that nobody can take away, though several people will try.

Membership is open to anyone who has ever said "I'm not against it as such".

£5Lifetime. No renewals. No newsletter.
  • Post-nominal letters N.O.B.
  • Free A4 poster, choice of four designs, posted to you
  • Membership number and printable certificate
  • Your name on the Register (optional, but who wouldn't)
Join now

What you get

The letters

Members are entitled to use the post-nominal letters N.O.B. after their name, in the manner of a professional registration. Use them on emails to the council, letters to the paper, LinkedIn, the parish newsletter and, in due course, your headstone. Example: Margaret Pemberton-Quill, N.O.B. It changes how people read the rest of the sentence.

The poster

A4, printed on 170gsm silk, which is thicker than most planning policy. Choose from four designs: "Not Here. Not Now. Not Ever.", "This Household Objects", "Protected by Newts" and "This Household Is Registered", which carries the arms. It comes in a stiff envelope, second class, because first class would only encourage the Post Office.

The number

Every member receives a unique number. Quote it at parish meetings for gravitas. Quote it at the planning officer for effect. Numbers are issued in order, so join early and lord it over the others.

The certificate

Printable, frameable, suitable for the downstairs loo, the study, or the window facing the neighbour who put in for the extension.

Gift membership

Buy one for the neighbour who put in for the extension. We will post the poster to you, so you can deliver it in person, through the letterbox, at night. For something more substantial, the £15 Gift Pack adds a printed certificate, a sticker sheet and an Objection Pad.

Join for £5

Your Name, N.O.B.

Preview all three on the poster page.

Secure payment by Stripe. We collect your postal address at checkout so we can send the poster. We do not sell your data. We objected to the data centre.

Terms of membership

  1. "Lifetime" refers to the lifetime of the member, the association, the website, or the current planning application, whichever ends first.
  2. Membership confers no legal, professional, academic or moral standing. It is, however, real in the sense that you paid for it.
  3. N.O.B. is not a protected title. Neither is "consultant", and look how well that has gone for them.
  4. Members may not use their membership to support a development. Doing so is grounds for expulsion, and we will want the poster back.
  5. The poster is dispatched second class within 14 days, or as soon as Pat has found the stamps.
  6. The Register of Members lists first name and county only. It is not that register. It is a nicer one, with a waiting list. We will not publish your address. We know what you're like about addresses.
  7. Refunds are available to anyone who can demonstrate that they have never objected to anything. To date, nobody has qualified.
  8. Any disputes will be heard at the next parish meeting, in the three-minute slot, which you will be allowed to overrun.